


Lamented Memories of a Stranger

by imaginarydaydreams



Category: To The Moon (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bittersweet, Gen, I'm actually at a loss of how to describe this fic in terms of tags, Light Angst, idk man I just had an impulse to write for this fandom, it's bittersweet but more sweet than bitter, usually I write heavy angst but this isn't it, we stan Kan Gao thank you for coming to my TEDTalk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-23
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-03-13 06:30:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18935323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginarydaydreams/pseuds/imaginarydaydreams
Summary: A retelling of the ending to To The Moon; Neil and Eva have a conversation about Eva’s taken risk.





	Lamented Memories of a Stranger

**Author's Note:**

> HI YES I LOVED, LOVE, AND WILL FOREVER LOVE THIS GAME SERIES AAAAAAAA!!! I’ve always wondered whether or not Neil ever mentioned anything after freaking out over River’s fate (before the whole NASA explanation) so here we goOOOOOO Depression Hours™ are a MUST.

**“I heard that you can see the best view from here—the top of the rocket, just as you like it.”**

Neil looked at Eva’s outstretched hand, a gentle smile on her face as she looked down at him from the bridge railing. The sunset behind her cast everything in a golden light, highlighting her hair and face to make it seem like she was shining, radiant. 

**“I actually enjoy the bottom of the rocket more,”**  he joked as he grabbed onto her hand, letting her pull him up,  **“the thrusters were always the best; to think of all that fuel burning to a crisp before being cast off like they were nothing. It’s pretty neat but honestly a shame.”**

Eva merely hummed a response, giving him a slight nod.  **“Now that you say it, that sounds more like a Neil Watts answer if I’ve ever heard one.”**  She turned her head towards the setting sun just over the horizon. To where Johnny and River were set to take off very soon. **“And you’re right. But I think the view here is still nice.”**

He followed her gaze and his breath nearly caught.

The view was indeed amazing, an almost picturesque beauty to it. Definitely a fitting end to this job, cheesy fanfare and all. If there was one thing that Neil had to say about this mission, with all its twists and turns, it was that Eva sure knew how to create one hell of a scene.

Not that he would ever admit it though. That was too cliche and Neil liked to think he had at least some standards.

They sat in silence, watching the minutes tick by as the sun dipped lower and lower, making way for deep purples and blues to replace the warm hues of remaining daylight. 

**“You know,”** Neil spoke after what seemed like forever, **“you had me seriously worried there for a sec when you went and deleted—** _moved_ **River just like that. You didn’t even tell me or anything.”**

Another silence fell between them but the words still echoed vibrantly in his head.

_“Eva, come on, you can’t just do this! Deleting her is like removing a giant part of Johnny’s life! We’ve seen his memories; we know what he wants and his wish is—”_

_“No, Neil. We don’t._

_“We can’t develop sentiment towards a simulation, towards someone we don’t even know. We have a job to do and—I don’t know about you, but I’m not about to get fired and possibly sued because we thought we knew what was best._

_“Now, move aside._

_“I promise I’ll be done soon.”_

Even now, he could still feel his heart racing, pulse quickening as his limbs scrambled to move, do something,  _anything_ , just to make it in time before something bad happened.

Before a big mistake was made with not enough time to fix it over again.

His attention was brought back to reality at her sigh, the slight movement of her hand running through long locks just barely visible in the corner of his eye. 

**“Like I said, I didn’t even know if it was going to work,”**  she murmured quietly, eyes trained on a passing cloud.  **“I didn’t want to get your hopes up in case I was wrong.”**

**“Mm, I see,”**  he simply stated. It still wasn’t the answer he wanted, but it was a start. Honestly he wasn’t even sure why he was getting so worked up.  **“Yeah no, you’re right. But it just…”**  A pause. **“Ah, man, it’s just…weird.”**  Eva looked over at him, a faint curiosity present in her gaze, giving him the strength to continue.

**“We see these people’s lives play out,”**  he said slowly, gesturing to the newly created world around them,  **“we play god with their memories, reset and recreate them with the simple press of a button and _maybe_  a little effort…**

**“But sometimes I forget that these are real people. Like, real people who lived these lives but just threw away those experiences for the chance at a new life, a life that’s not even real.**

**“It’s just weird.”** His hand dropped back to his lap. Neil turned his gaze downwards, looking into the waves below as if expecting an answer to these feelings bubbling up inside of him, but only getting silence in return.  **“I don’t know whether I want to thank the old geezers for funding my paycheck or if I want to shake them and tell them that they’re making the biggest mistake of their lives.”**

He glanced at Eva from the corner of his eyes, half expecting her to call him a stupid, sentimental baby. To tell him that he was just overreacting or something, laugh at him or something, so he could bounce back to his normal, dorky, wise-cracking self and shove down these emotions like he always did…

…but it never came.

Instead, Eva scooted ever so close to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, giving him a sympathetic smile. His eyes widened at the sudden contact, looking from her hand to her smile, then back down to her hand.

It was…super awkward, if he was being honest; he wasn’t used to this. 

**“Ah,”**  he coughed, turning away to look elsewhere,  **“Am I dying too or, like…what is this?”**  He gave another glance to the hand resting on his shoulder before his eyes turned back to her. The weird glint in his eyes spoke  _volumes._   **“Because I’m sorry to say, Eva, I’m already in a committed relationship to my job and that sweet, sweet paycheck…”**

Her smile instantly dropped and replaced itself with a dead-panned expression, lips pursed into a thin line as her gaze hardened to a crystal-like quality. The hand on his shoulder immediately shoved him away, causing him to almost lose his balance, had he not had a death grip on the railing. (He was prepared! Take that, Eva!)  **“I swear to god, Neil,”**  she said,  **“you always find a way to ruin the mood no matter what.”**

**“What can I say? It’s my specialty.”**  His cheeky smile was back on his features as if the serious look in his eyes was never there. A silence, this time comfortable, settled over them as their gazes returned to the setting sun, waiting for the inevitable.

Waiting for the end with saddened smiles full of warmth instead of embittered scowls. 

**“You know, if you ever need someone to talk to, my office is right down the hall.”**

**“Then I’ll be sure to bring my best references and memes, just for you.”**

**“On second thought, my office hours are now closed only to individuals named Neil Watts.”**

Laughter filled the space between them before the sight of a rocket trailing through the sky, bright and beautiful, caught their attentions. Over the horizon that now glittered midnight blue, the rocket streaked across the sky, a shooting star amidst stardust symbolizing the end of a dream come true. 

**“I hope that Johnny’s happy with his new life—with all of this, in the end.”**  Eva looked over to Neil, who still had his eyes trained on the shuttle as it traveled higher and higher. A bit of pride yet melancholy danced through his gaze but she knew that he’d be fine. He always was after these missions. 

**“I’m sure he is,”**  she said, looking back at the sky. The rocket had just disappeared beyond the stratosphere. But if she looked a bit closer, she could barely make out the happiness of a certain dying man shining over the stars.  **“After all, these memories are based around Johnny’s own feelings, thoughts, aspirations. Not to mention, you said it yourself: we always succeed because we’re awesome.**

**“So…I’m sure everything will be alright.”**

_[Initialization finalized. Episode One - To the Moon: Complete]_  


End file.
